Dear Me,

2018 was a remarkable year for our family. As a blended family of five, we embarked on our first international adventure to Europe, celebrating my 40th birthday. I also graduated from grad school at USF and reached my first major career milestone.

At the time, I felt invincible—convinced that tragedy couldn’t touch us. I often told myself that God was watching over us, protecting my family and me from harm.

I wrote the letter below to my younger, more naive self.

"Life was so different just six years ago…," I thought to myself.

Dear Me in 2018,

If there’s anything I can share about what’s coming, it’s this:

Be brave. The path ahead will be unimaginable, filled with pain that no one should have to endure. It will feel excruciating at times. But here I am, a testament that you will make it through.

Be strong. This strength isn’t just for you; it’s for those around you. Your heart will ache, and breathing may feel heavy. You’ll realize that strength isn’t always a choice; sometimes, it’s simply what you must do.

Have faith. You will question everything you thought you knew about your faith. Anger will rise, and that’s okay. Know that your feelings are heard. Your thoughts and cries do not go unnoticed.

It is not your fault. There will be days when you’ll feel like you could have done more. Remember: you did your best with what you had at the time. It was never your fault, and it never will be.

Be patient with yourself. This journey will be tough and painful. Allow yourself grace when you find your mind racing into dark places (you’ll know what I mean).

Try to laugh. Seek joy again. Embracing happiness doesn’t mean you’ve forgotten; it means you’re living, loving, and feeling more deeply than ever. And that’s perfectly okay. (By the way, she doesn’t want to see you sad.)

Lastly, she is safe. She is healthy. She is happy.

With love,

Me in 2024 and forever..